May

Do you remember the quest “Claws from the Deep” from Wetlands? It was a pretty fun quest.
Objectives:
Kill 12 Bluegill Murlocs.
Slay Gobbler and take his head.
Bring Gobbler’s Head to Karl Boran in Menethil Harbor.
Rewards
You will receive: 14s
Yes, 14 SILVER!!! Wow!!!

It was one of my favorite quests of all time, probably because it was immensely satisfying to finally kill Gobbler before all the other 8000 people that were camping his spawn point. It was also a bit odd that whenever he killed a low level nub, he would always exclaim “WHO’S MY DADDY!?” I’ve submitted many tickets and bug reports about that line, as it clearly should be “WHO’S YOUR DADDY!?” The response from the Blizzard team has always been something to the effect of “the game is working as intended.” During countless IM conversations and dinnertime banter, I’ve mocked Blizzard’s obvious solecism here.

Fast forward to present-day Outlands, where a now metamucil-aged Karl Boran was walking around Shattrath City with a bright yellow “!!!” over his head. For those of you unfamiliar with WoW, a yellow “!” over some character’s head means he has a quest, whereas a bright yellow “!!!” denotes he has a super duper fun quest.

Upon speaking with him, we found this quest:
Claws from the Deep II: Gobbler’s Daddy’s Revenge
Objectives:
Kill 12,000 Elite Murlocs.
Slay Gobbler’s Daddy (Morogrim Tidewalker) and take his head.
Bring Gobbler’s Daddy’s Head to Karl “Metamucil” Boran in Shattrath City.
Rewards
You will receive: 24s

Thus, we ventured into SSC to continue our ultimate favorite quest(line) ever. After a while, it was evident that Daddy > Gobby. It was only a matter of short time, however, that Renaissance > Daddy. After Morogrim was defeated, he whispered, “Who’s my girlfriend’s husband’s cousin’s former roommate’s dog’s cat’s former owner’s grandfather?” We remain hopeful that the quest “Claws from the Deep III: Gobbler’s Daddy’s Girlfriend’s Husband’s Cousin’s Former Roommate’s Dog’s Cat’s Former Owner’s Grandfather” is currently in Blizzard internal testing and that the Undead Karl Boran will soon have a “!!!” over his head again.

Thus, the purpose of this post has been an official Kharmander apology to Blizzard. You guys rock, and your grasp of the English language rocks as well. I am, and will forever be, the grammar nub. And please please please continue this questline. Thanks.

Story by: Kharmander
Art by: Analla